What To Do When You Are In An Unhappy Marriage After Baby Arrives

Are you having relationship problems after having a baby?

The arrival of a child is generally considered to be one of the major outcomes of the couple. Together, you have brought into this world a little being who, in a way, corresponds to the sum of both.

But this newcomer will completely transform your daily life and your dynamics.

It is for this reason that it is common to have a couple of problems after birth. To cope, both spouses must reinvent their relationship.

Generally, intimacy becomes a couple of problems after a baby. Indeed, the different relationship with the child created between the mother and the father affects their daily privacy.

The constant attention given to the child keeps partners away who suffer in addition to a lack of sleep and the stress often encountered by new parents.

The risk is then that the routine gradually separates the two partners. To remedy this, they need to make time for each other and communicate well.

Everyone must also allow themselves to breathe outside the family structure.

Loss of privacy is often mentioned as a relationship problem after birth.

It is a delicate subject, complicated to broach as a couple. It is linked to the physical changes experienced by the woman but also to the perception of the companion of her new role as a mother.

The two lovers become parents and see their gaze change on the other. It is for this reason that it is important to recreate a new intimacy in the couple.

If you let the distance settle, you will not always be able to pick up the pieces.

What matters above all is to continue to listen to each other daily.

You should not seek to regain your former dynamic, but create a new one, which incorporates the needs of the new addition to your family while not neglecting your own.

1) Finding a balance between wife and mother

For women, pregnancy is a particularly transformative event.

She sees her body transform to welcome her baby. It is both a beautiful and strange process that must be experienced to be understood.

But childbirth does not have the effect of a magic wand, bringing the woman back to her previous appearance.

Significant changes continue to occur in her body, particularly in the first few weeks after the birth of her child.

Some mothers may be uncomfortable with their bodies and move away from their companions. This is a problem of a couple after birth, often mentioned.

But much more than physical appearance, it is the relationship with the child that can affect the relationship between spouses.

Motherhood sometimes offers a unique source of joy, which is not always possible to share with your partner. There is indeed a reasonably close relationship between mother and child, made even more intense in the event of breastfeeding.

The hormones that are produced at this time can also cause a significant drop in libido in women. In general, it is normal to experience difficulties in the couple after birth.

The fatigue of childbirth is followed by the fatigue of the first moments with the baby.

In these first months, the child needs a lot of attention from these two parents. If the two partners do not allow themselves a moment of respite, the distance increases between them, sometimes until separation.

Indeed, numerous studies show that many couples separate in the first two years after their child’s birth.

Try to keep that balance between being a brand new mom of a baby and a wife to your husband and continue to give both the attention they need.

2) Finding your place in the mother-child relationship

During pregnancy, men try to best support their partners. In some cases, their desires take second place to accommodate the wishes of their spouses best.

It is also in this way that they find their place in this unique phenomenon: pregnancy and participating in this process.

However, after childbirth, other changes appear in the couple’s daily life.

Everyone has a somewhat abstract idea of the child and his requirements.

Take a look at this fantastic guide for first time parents.

Even while reading all the books in the world, it is impossible to realize everything that will change in your daily life when the baby arrives.

A frequently cited problem of the couple after birth is the alienation of the companion. The lover who becomes a father must find his place in relation to the often-strong relationship between the mother and her child.

If you find that you are pushing your husband away because of the amount of time you spend with your newborn, check out:

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3) Communication to prevent any relationship problems after birth

Arguing in your relationship after birth can be particularly dangerous for the structure of the relationship.

If you don’t react, you risk drifting away beyond repair, leading to a breakup.

To avoid such a situation, the partners must continue to communicate with each other.

To establish a good dynamic with their child, they must divide the tasks and take turns on specific points.

But apart from that, they also need to make time for themselves.

Talking from time to time about something other than their child helps prevent the appearance of a relationship problem after birth. Even if your baby is a big part of your thoughts, you need to discuss other topics with your partner.

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4) Take time for yourself

The life of a couple already brings its share of responsibilities. But this is not comparable to parenting, which gives a unique role, as well as full-time employment, to two people.

Being responsible for a person is an important task, which is far from easy to accomplish. It is, therefore, possible to have conflicts between the couple about the baby.

The two partners must discuss together before making one small or any big decision.

Like the couple, the family is also based on the concept of trust. Parents should trust each other in relation to their child.

However, taking time for yourself helps to relax your mind and places you in a much better mood to deal with parenting challenges.

Find hobbies, continue to go on dates or get engaged with favorite activities to help you to connect closer with your family.

Need romantic vacation inspiration? Check out:

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5) Professional help against baby clash?

After the baby blues, many specialists are now talking about the baby clash, the separation following the birth of a first child.

If this phenomenon is observed, it is, however, far from being inevitable.

To deal with this, partners can also go to a relationship expert. Indeed, if after the baby’s arrival, significant tensions have appeared in your relationship, going to a psychologist can be beneficial.

You learn to communicate better. With this kind of therapy, you can gradually build a new relationship, thus incorporating the changes that occurred when your child arrived.

If you don’t do anything, you risk pulling even further apart until you separate.

If you find that there is a relationship breakdown after baby in your marriage, find a balance between being a new mom and a wife, understand that there is lots to learn as a new mom, but don’t push your husband away while doing so.

Both partners should communicate frequently with each other to avoid a disconnect. Take time for yourself to decrease negative energy, and seek professional help to prevent marital conflict of having a new baby.

Use this article and learn how to revive your marriage after having a baby.

Did you have any problems in your marriage after having a baby? How did you cope? Share your tips on what helped your marriage after the baby was born, we’d love to hear from you.