How Do You Know If Someone Is Married To You For Convenience?
Is your marriage based on love or convenience?
Well, if you are not very sure of the answers, it is time to know how to differentiate between true love and comfort.
Today, millions of couples are locked in a loveless marriage simply because of the convenience of it. For many, convenience takes a front seat as it is just easier and simpler than those deep, emotional attachments of love.
Are you staying in a loveless marriage because of the children?
The Marriage of Convenience
The marriage of convenience can be defined as being together just for financial, practical, or political reasons. The term was popularized during the 1700s and 1800s when ideals of marriage gained momentum.
In modern times, people use the phrase as a slur, and while marriage may be free of any kind of emotions and/or physical abuse, there is no life in the relationship or reasonable standards of happiness.
Today, people marry for love as well as other reasons or a non-love motive, and that could be anything. They hide behind flimsy consolations or stay in a marriage just to save face.
Today, we live in difficult times and in a difficult world. Two people might get together not because of the right reasons but simply because of a relationship of convenience.
It is true that each one of us looks for the genuine care and love in a relationship. However, your partner might be with you not because he or she is in love with you but simply for the security and convenience of having someone in their life.
They may have decided to remain in the marriage, perhaps because of the comforts of habit or simply because they cannot afford to divorce. It is indeed hard to sustain the romantic dream of marriage, and this is when the marriage of convenience may sneak in stealthily and without you knowing.
Here are 25 ways to afford a divorce without going broke.
Any marriage that is not based on love and care is sure to turn meaningless and will leave the couple no longer happy. Couples who are in love are forever searching for more meaningful connections and exhibit different actions and behaviors than those who are in the relationship for convenience and their selfish needs.
Pay close attention to your marriage and watch out for signs that you might be living in a marriage out of convenience.
1. Your partner never puts you as a priority
If you observe that your partner doesn’t make an extra effort to reach out to see you or meet you or talk to you, that should be seen as a red flag. Real couples want to be together, and no matter how busy their schedule is, they will go all out to see each other and are excited about it.
2. Your partner never makes any future plans with you
As a couple, you two should be planning things together and get excited about a happy future. However, if your partner shies away from doing so, there are apparently no mutual goals for the future.
The truth may hurt, but your partner is not as a true-life partner and simply seeks you for some company.
3. Your partner has broken up with you before
Many couples get back together after a separation or even a divorce. Maybe they realize that living together is better for their social image or children or finances. You don’t want to be alone and simply want your old life back and for regular sex, as dating is no longer your cup of tea.
Well, what you are walking into is a marriage of convenience.
4. Your partner makes no effort to be with your family
Couples who are in love make efforts to know each other’s families and spend time with them. If your partner is not making any such efforts, well, it is obvious that he doesn’t care much about you or your family.
He makes no real effort to be with your family members and will just be around to make things look okay.
5. Your partner needs you financially
If your partner relies on you for his major needs or expects you to foot the major bills, well, he is probably seeking some financial security and stability here and is with you to lower his personal expenses. If he is one of these people, you should definitely give your relationship a second thought.
6. Your partner gives you the bare minimum
When even everything seems too easy and effortless in a relationship, it gets monotonous and boring. The marriage loses its spark if there are no special dates or flirting.
So, if your partner is just investing the basics of time and efforts in the marriage, he or she is just giving it 1% instead of 100%.
7. Your partner makes his own decisions
If you, as a couple, rarely sit down together to discuss things or make any decisions together, well, it can be seen as a warning sign.
Healthy marriages are all about sharing and caring and making decisions together, even if there are disagreements. Couples in a marriage of convenience will show no such interests.
8. Your spouse prefers the company of his friends
If you or your partner like the company of your friends better and spend more time with them, well, you need to give a second look at your marriage.
While it is not uncommon for couples to socialize with their own group of friends, but if those frequencies are on the rise, you should have alarm bells ringing in your brain.
Do not confuse your relationship in your marriage and assess the kind of bond you have with your partner. Just keep the above signs in mind to know if it is a marriage infused with love or simply one of convenience.
A stagnant marriage is equally bad as a bad marriage.
Well, there are many couples out there who are stuck in a marriage of convenience. The least they can do together is try to improve the relationship by adding genuine love and save their marriage.
Even little gestures and small appreciations can bring back the lost spark in your marriage and turn it from a marriage of convenience to one of love and trust.
Other articles you might be interested in:
How Do I Know When It’s Time For A Divorce?
5 Danger Signs He Doesn’t Love You Anymore
Are You Stuck In A Marriage Because Of Financial Reasons?
Observe you and your spouse’s behaviors carefully and honestly, so you know if you’re in a marriage of convenience.
Were you in a marriage out of convenience? Were you able to turn it into a loving marriage? We’d love to hear from you.
I am definitely in a marriage of convenience. We are in the process of separating. I wonder how common these types of marriages are?
Sorry to hear, but I really do hope things turn around for your marriage. Yes, this type of marriage is very common, unfortunately.
This was wonderfully written. I am not married however I just broke up with someone yesterday who was definitely with me out of convenience as everything that you said describes him very well. God bless you and thank you for your insight. 😊
Thank you. I know that you’ll find someone who really loves you. Thanks for sharing.
Some men who are over 40 and have never been married (like my husband) use women to marry so that their parents or people around them don’t suspect that they’re gay. I’m in a marriage where it’s clear that my husband didn’t want to be married, but proposed to me due to pressures from his parents.
I’m sorry to hear this. It’s an unfortunate situation when others are being used for any reason. I hope that you do end up in a loving marriage that you deserve. Thank you for sharing.